Raising mentally strong kids who are equipped to take on real-world challenges requires parents to give up the unhealthy — yet popular — parenting practices that are robbing kids of mental strength.
Of course, helping kids build mental muscle isn’t easy — it requires parents to be mentally strong as well. Watching kids struggle, pushing them to face their fears, and holding them accountable for their mistakes is tough. But those are the types of experiences kids need to reach their greatest potential.
Parents who train their children’s brains for a life of meaning, happiness, and success, avoid these 13 things:
1. They don’t condone a victim mentality.
They teach their children to look at the rejections and failures positively. They teach them to handle them as their strengths.
2. They don’t parent out of guilt
“Yes” becomes the answer to many questions due to guilt which might spoil the kid.
3. Strong parents don’t make their child the center of the universe
Giving too much attention to your kid might turn him/her into a self-centred person. Hence, mentally strong parents give love but not extended confidence.
4. They don’t allow fear to dictate their choices
Keeping their child safe from the society’s evil has become necessary. But restricting them interferes with their development.
5. They don’t give their child power over them
Mentally strong parents maintain the hierarchy of their family and their child is only given enough freedom that is necessary to learn and grow.
6. Strong parents don’t expect perfection
Not every kid can excel in every field. Parents who know this will never force their child above their capability.
7. They don’t let their child avoid responsibility
Being responsible helps children build a harmonious life.
8. They don’t shield their child from pain
Every child experiences pain and anxiety. Mentally strong parents help them to deal with it, rather than running from it.
9. They don’t feel responsible for their child’s emotions
Emotions are results of improving social skills. They need to learn to control them and mentally strong parents help them do so.
10. Strong parents don’t lose sight of their values
Immense pressure of being a parent doesn’t dull the light of their values which they pass to their child.
11. They don’t take shortcuts to avoid discomfort
Mentally strong parents know that sometimes doing something by going out of the way helps us learn different things. Hence, rather than choosing an easy path, they guide the child through a harder but educational way.
12. They don’t confuse discipline with punishment
Discipline improves the child; punishment is to make the child suffer.
13. Strong parents don’t prevent their child from making mistakes
Mentally strong parents teach their children to learn from their mistakes and deal with the consequences themselves.