“I want a man who’s handsome, rich and available.”
How often have you heard this one? I bet you’ve heard this your entire life, if not, at least your entire adulthood. And have you noticed a trend? Society has been framing itself on these very standards of quality. It’s no longer focused on intimate relationships, but also on friendships and career partners as well. It’s a shame really, because there are far from “important” traits.
But let’s stay focused on the intimate relationship, shall we. The traits have molded people into “plastic” versions of themselves, simply by stating the importance of materialistic goals. The truth of the matter is, there are traits that are much more important and these traits are the key to a lasting relationship.
Unfortunately, many people believe true love is easy. While true love may feel comfortable and familiar, it takes work just like any other sort of relationship. Finding a mate who believes in work, when it comes to having a successful relationship, is the best choice.
Putting in the work means making time for each other, being considerate and communicating. These are only a few tools which can be used to improve and grow the relationship. A mate who agrees in working hard for the life of the relationship is a good mate indeed.
Although this might not sound like the most exciting trait, it is important. Those who care about keeping promises, following through on responsibilities and being dutiful make the relationship feel more secure. Instead of looking for Mr. Bad boy, try searching for Mr. Responsible. In the long run, a spouse of this nature will make life more pleasurable for the both of you.
3) Stable emotions
Okay, I’m not saying that those with emotional issues don’t deserve a fair chance, I just know how unpredictable they can be. A mate who is emotionally stable will also be easier to live with. There will be fewer outbursts and less anger associated with issues. Emotional stability also means less chance of having a problem with narcissistic episodes due to high sensitivity and lack of empathy.
Unstable emotions tend to make the relationship fall into turmoil. Why waste time on keeping the peace when you can already have peace and work on more important issues like the future.
Faithfulness is actually the most important characteristic, in my opinion. Why would you want to have a beautiful wife with nice physique, if she couldn’t be loyal to your relationship? I’m not saying you can’t be both beautiful and faithful, but the focus is on the character and not the physical appearance.
Loyalty takes away worry and strife, and having peace in your heart means having peace in all aspects of life. No matter what happens, if you have a loyal partner, you can weather anything.
Now here’s another outstanding feature of a good choice of mate. If you fall in love with someone who is similar to you, then you will have much in common when the lustful thrill is gone. For many people, the initial meeting, dating and falling in love comprises of a very exciting sex life. When you’ve become used to this, however, you may not have much left.
If you are similar to the mate you pick, then after the initial thrill of the chase is over, you will still be deeply in love. You can share common ideas and laugh at the ways you seem to love the same things. This is what deepens and strengthens true love, and the basis of true love to begin with.
Remember this list when searching for true love!
Stop looking so much at the outside of a person, it can be deceiving. Take time to find out what you’re getting yourself into. Are the like you? Are they kind and considerate? Does the man you love keep promises and take care of his responsibilities in a timely manner?
All these things matter, and if you are able to find a mate that fits all the above, then hold on to them. They just might be the one to share a lifetime with.