It is your date night and you are panicking over what to wear, which venue will sweep him/her off his/her feet, what gifts to take along with you, and rehearsing conversations in your head, so that you do not talk about something the other did not like the last time. Are you? Yes? Then stop. And think. Is it the real you who is going out there to meet that someone special? Do you find a date night as stressful as an office meeting?
If you have nodded to every question above, then it is time to reassess your relationship.
The best relationships are those where you do not need to pretend to be someone you are not.
The relationship should not be a continuous game of impressing each other. Rather, it should be effortless. You should date someone with whom you can be yourself.
Your partner should not make you want to lie.
If you do not like watching soccer, then you should be able to say it on their face and not pretend to enjoy it while thinking when the torture will end.
Date someone who is interested in knowing you inside-out and will listen patiently to whatever you have to say instead of taking delight only in their own stories.
Someone who while listening to you, will not judge you or will laugh at you. The one who you do not feel afraid to share your most embarrassing secrets with; someone who will not take advantage of your vulnerability. Someone who will support you through your thick and thin, someone who even after knowing all your flaws will not stop loving you and will also help you grow and become better with each passing day.
Before a date, you should be excited about meeting your partner and should not be stressing over your look.
For instance, if you are a foodie, find a person with whom a date can also mean standing in an overcrowded street and sharing a burger.
Date someone who is attracted not to all the superficial details of your life like your status or the amount of money you have in your bank account.
Such people will take no time in leaving you in your distressing times.
We are not saying that you should stop dressing up or looking handsome/ beautiful. We are just saying that appearance should never be the basis or the most important factor in your relationship. If someday you end up all shabby and worn out, your partner should still love you because they love you for what you are and not how you look. They should love you for the person that you are.
Reality should always be put ahead of appearance. And if you have got it the other way round, then surely your prince/princess is in another castle.